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Broken Halo Page 9
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Confetti?
I quickly wrench my gaze away from him. I refuse to think wedding-related thoughts about him.
I don't even know him.
"It won't even really be a date," Colby says. "It's just a 'thank you'."
I nod.
Colby laughs softly. "You should say no, Chloe."
Something about his tone makes me look at him. I shouldn't look at him while I make my decision. Looking at him will sway me to do the wrong thing.
"You should say no," he repeats.
"Why?" I ask hesitantly. Does he know I have a fiancé and have been ditching my ring?
I would die if he somehow knew.
He gives me a sad little smile. "Good girls, like you, shouldn't get mixed up with guys like me."
Then, in one swift move he's pinned me against the wall and his face is inches from mine.
Chapter 11
I'm instantly breathless.
His gaze is on my lips.
"Guys like you?" I whisper. "What are you like?"
"You'll find out if you stick around long enough," Colby murmurs.
He pushes away from the wall and I begin to breathe normally again.
"Say yes to the date," he says.
"The date that isn't a date. Right?"
He just looks at me.
"Tomorrow at seven," I tell him.
He nods and then turns on his heel and returns to the drama class.
I leave. In fact, I run all the way to where I parked my car, feeling like there's a wild animal snapping at my heels.
I have a date," I announce to Gina and Leah over spaghetti and meatballs that night.
Gina has been shopping and replaced my spaghetti. She's even cooked her own spaghetti and made dinner for all of us. She's also ordered a tube of my expensive toothpaste online. She has well and truly redeemed herself.
Gina doesn't look up from whatever blog post she's writing on her laptop.
Leah has just returned from a date with her fiancé, Andrew, and is busy texting him. Probably saying how much she loves him. I've read her texts before because I wanted to compare them to the texts that Timothy and I exchange. Hers and Andrew's texts are much juicier.
"I have a date," I repeat.
"With Timothy?" Leah mumbles, not looking up from her cell phone. "Yeah. You told us you're going home this weekend."
"Not with Timothy," I say.
Both their heads snap up. Suddenly, I have their full attention.
"Not with Timothy?" Gina asks.
My stomach twists in knots. I twirl spaghetti around my fork.
"With who?" Leah asks.
I stuff my mouth full of spaghetti and meatballs, stalling for time.
"Is it a work date kind of thing?" Gina asks. "With someone from College Life? Or Quin?"
I shake my head. I swallow. "You know I told you about the dude who I chased down a thief for?"
"Mr. Tawny Eyes?" Gina asks.
"Yes. Well, the date is with him. But it's not really a date. It's tomorrow. Tuesday. Real dates are on weekends."
Both my friends are staring at me.
Leah rakes her hair back and looks at Gina.
Gina looks at Leah.
I sense some kind of silent communication going on.
Then Gina looks at me, her eyes narrowed.
Right. So their silent communication was about which one of them is going to let me have it. It seems Gina has volunteered.
"How did you get in touch with him again after Friday?" she demands. "And why did he ask you out when you're wearing that non-cheap ring." Her gaze lowers to my bare ring finger. "You removed your ring?"
"I didn't wear it at all today."
"I thought you would have taken it to wear after your audition."
I say nothing.
"So Mr. Tawny Eyes thinks you're single?" Gina asks.
"He…didn't ask. By the way, his name is Colby and his eyes are better than tawny."
"That's your excuse?" Gina gives me an incredulous look. "So, what are his eyes?"
I'm silent. I don't want to be accused of being poetic again.
Gina makes a weird throaty noise. "What's that sound?" she asks me. "Um, I think it might be the sound of that halo above your head shattering into itty bitty irredeemable pieces." She looks at Leah. "Can you believe her?"
To redeem myself, I tell them everything. About seeing Colby on Quin's computer, at the art gallery, and at the drama class today. They listen as I tell them the whole story and how things have snowballed into what they are now.
It's not like I went out looking for a cute guy to go on a date with behind Timothy's back. I'm just exploring what this could mean.
Gina gives a low whistle when I'm done. "You've been holding out on us. How dare you!"
I notice, from her tone and the light in her eyes, that she's no longer planning to set me straight.
Leah, however, still looks incredulous. "So you both think this is God?"
"I don't know what to think," I reply.
"God would never tell you to do something wrong."
Gina rolls her eyes. "She hasn't done anything wrong."
"Yet," Leah adds.
She's right. In that moment, I decide that this date with Colby tomorrow will be a turning point for me, relationship-wise.
"If things go well with Colby tomorrow," I tell my friends, "I'm going to break up with Timothy when I go home this weekend."
It's a little premature, but I can't have my conscience eating at me like this. If I'm going to explore where things might lead with Colby, I need to end things with Timothy.
I pause. "But what if I break up with Timothy and things don't go anywhere with Colby?" I wonder aloud.
"Then you'll just have to face the consequences of your decision," Gina replies. "But at least it's your decision. There's nothing worse than having to deal with the consequences of someone else's decision for you."
Leah's lips are pursed. "You need to do the right thing, Chloe."
"By 'the right thing' you mean she should go ahead and ditch Timothy?" Gina asks.
"She should ditch her fiancé when she doesn't even know anything about this other guy?" Leah asks.
"Why not?"
Need I reiterate that Gina doesn't like Timothy?
"What if the date doesn't go well and you decide to stick with Timothy?" Leah asks.
I know why she's asking. She doesn't think it's fair to treat Timothy this way. She's right. It isn't. "I'll confess to Timothy about the date, even if I decide to stick with him."
Gina beams at me. "Chloe, you blush whenever you talk about this guy. He may not be the 'right' guy, but at least there's something there. When you talk about Timothy, there is absolutely nothing. I want you to know that I wholeheartedly support what you're doing."
Leah gasps.
"I'm not saying Colby is 'the one'," Gina says quickly. "None of us knows whether he is or not. But I support the fact that you're now willing to step up and make decisions for yourself. Who to marry is a huge decision. That's something you should pray about and let God guide you. You think it's noble to let your mom and nana decide things for you. You think that shows you're a sweet, Godly girl. Well, guess what? It doesn't. All you're doing is letting them take God's place in your life. And there's nothing Godly about that. You need to get to know God for yourself."
"Yes," Leah says. "She needs to get to know God for herself. That means she doesn't need anybody forcing her into things she doesn't want, whether that's Timothy, her mom, or you."
Gina frowns. "When have I ever forced anything on her?"
"This afternoon when you were going to drive her to the audition without first asking what she wanted to do."
Gina rolls her eyes. "Please, spare me."
Suddenly, I'm having doubts about the whole thing. "I do want to make decisions for myself," I tell Gina, "but I'm terrified of facing the consequences. What if Timothy is the right guy for me?"
Gina gives
a longsuffering sigh.
Leah gives me a pitying look.
I stare down at my bowl of spaghetti. "What if the fact that he's against me acting is a sign that I need to give up acting?"
"Or what if it's a sign that he's the wrong guy?" Gina asks. She reaches across the table and pats my hand. "Stop being so afraid to make a mistake, and get to know God for yourself."
On Tuesday morning, I still can't bring myself to switch on my cell phone. I don't want to hear from Timothy or Mom.
I go through the motions and attend my college classes for the day. I email Quin to ask if College Life has been in touch yet. They haven't. I tell him to email me once they have.
I wait for an email from him all day, but nothing comes.
When I get home in the evening, I shut myself in my room and try not to hyperventilate at the fact that I'm going out with Colby in two hours.
I look at my cell phone and realize that if I don't switch it on, I won't be going out with him because he won't know where to meet me.
I switch on my cell phone and it immediately begins to buzz with notifications. I've missed a dozen calls from Mom and Timothy and I have text messages from both of them.
My heart constricts at the mere sight of their names on my screen. I don't read their messages or listen to the voicemails they've left.
I have a message from a number that isn't stored on my phone. It came in last night at eleven-thirty. I tap on it: Hi, Chloe. It's Colby. I'll pick you up from your place at six forty-five tomorrow. We have to be somewhere awesome by seven-fifteen. You're going to love it. Please send me your address.
A strange feeling floods my whole being. It's both excitement and terror. Eager anticipation and anxiety.
I reply with my address.
Immediately, my cell phone buzzes with a response from him: Thanks. I thought maybe you'd changed your mind.
I don't respond. I switch off my cell phone again and then grab two chunks of my hair and squeeze my eyes shut.
I have no idea what I'm doing.
I prayed last night and this morning that God would give me some guidance about whether to marry Timothy. It's the first time I've done so except for last Friday when I asked him to send me the right guy. All along, I've just figured that it's safest to do what Mom and Nana say. It didn't even cross my mind that their choice for me might not be God's choice for me.
I would never tell Gina this. She'd consider me brainwashed and naive. But the truth is, I just figured Mom and Nana have prayed about it and God has told them. And that's why they're telling me.
"Please talk to me, God," I whisper. "I need some guidance."
I decide not to start getting ready until six fifteen. I never do anything to prepare for seeing Timothy so I shouldn't for Colby. As I take a shower, I realize that this will actually be my first-ever, real date. Timothy and I have been for meals together, but it has never felt like a date and we've never called it dating. It's just been grabbing a meal together. And there's never been any excitement.
I figured that was how it should be. Timothy is a pastor after all. And he's a serious, responsible man. He doesn't have time for frivolous things like simply having fun together.
I'm still putting on my makeup when I hear the doorbell. I glance at the clock. He's five minutes early.
I don't hear anybody going to get the door. Right now, Gina is probably fuming in the basement where she records her YouTube videos. The doorbell may have ruined her filming.
Leah is probably downstairs, but she's staying out of this.
I switch on my cell phone and text Colby to let him know I'll be out in a minute.
I don't receive a response. A few moments later, I hear the front door open.
"I opened the door but there's no one there," Leah shouts from downstairs.
"He's waiting for me in the car," I shout back, switching off my phone again.
"Is Chloe's dreamboat here?" I hear Gina say from downstairs. "I kinda want to get a look at the guy."
"I tried," Leah replies, "but he's parked halfway down the street. His car is amazing."
I grab my purse and head downstairs.
Gina and Leah look up at me as I descend. They fall silent and stare at me in shock.
"What?" I ask.
"You're wearing your sexiest little black dress?" Leah asks. "I thought this wasn't a real date?"
"It isn't. And this dress isn't sexy. I don't own a single piece of 'sexy' clothing."
Gina is still just staring at me.
"What time will you get back?" Leah asks.
"I don't think I'll be gone for more than two hours."
"You look gorgeous," Gina says, finally finding her tongue. "I can't believe you're doing this." She beams. "Have fun."
Leah nudges her. "Not too much fun."
I leave the house and shut the door behind me, exhaling deeply. I look around and spot Colby's flashy silver car halfway down the street. I slip my keys into my clutch purse and walk over. My heels are a little high for walking such a distance, but it can't be helped.
As I approach the car, the driver's side door opens, and Colby steps out.
My heart stutters, and I swear I hear harps and violins.
He's wearing navy dress slacks, a white shirt, and a handsome smile.
He's holding a single white rose.
A rose?
Panic wells in my gut.
This may be a Tuesday evening, but it's a real date.
Chapter 12
I have never received flowers from anyone except one time when Leah gave me flowers to celebrate a shampoo commercial that I landed.
I would go straight to the passenger's side, but since Colby is holding a flower, I have to go to him and accept it.
The moment I get within three steps of him, a crisp masculine scent wraps around me.
"I wanted to do this at your door," he says holding out the flower.
I accept it. "Thank you. You didn't have to."
He rounds the car, moving like a big cat, and opens the passenger door for me. I get in and he shuts the door.
I close my eyes briefly for the few seconds that I'm alone in the car before he gets into the driver's seat. How on earth did I, innocent Chloe Campbell, get myself a date with this big, dangerously hot guy?
He's dangerous for my peace of mind. Dangerous for my good girl reputation. Dangerous for where I am in life right now. I'm already dissatisfied. I don't need someone to give me that 'grass-is-greener' syndrome.
"How was your day?" he asks me.
"Fine."
He switches on the car and then begins to drive. "You look beautiful."
My cheeks instantly begin to flame. "Thanks."
He glances at me. "Are you blushing?"
"Of course not."
"You are. Don't you get told how beautiful you are every day? You must have guys telling you that all the time."
"I'm flattered that you think so, but that is not the case at all—except for the occasional lecherous director who is old enough to be my father."
"Really? What about at college?"
"College? I attend my classes, hand in assignments, do quizzes and that's about it."
"I'm really surprised to hear that. Maybe they're all intimidated by your beauty."
Intimidated by my beauty? I splutter with laughter.
"It's cute that you find that incredulous," Colby says. "I think most dudes your age are probably too immature to see you for the treasure that you are."
Treasure?
I look at him. His gaze is fixed on the road. He looks serious, not like he's joking.
Silence fills the car and I search my mind for something to fill it. I can't think of anything. My brain always seems to get sluggish around him.
"Been doing any more acting?" Colby asks. "I tried to get a ticket for Rumpelstiltskin but it's finished."
He wanted to come and watch me on stage? Timothy has never been to watch me in anything. He isn't interested. I once
tried to show him a commercial I was in and he suddenly had to make a phone call. Every time I tried, he would find some excuse not to watch. Before long, I stopped bothering.
"Yeah, I did it from July until last week," I tell Colby. "That contract has ended now. I had an audition for College Life yesterday, though."
"The TV series?"
"Yes."
"You're a pretty serious actress then." He makes a face. "Pardon me, 'actor'."
I giggle. "I'll answer to either. Yes, I'm a pretty serious actress. It's paid my way through college."
Colby sends me a wink. "You go, girl."
It's not a gushing response about how impressed he is and how amazing I must be. It's just a friendly comment. It's the perfect response from a guy. It's the kind of response I want from Timothy, but all he has for me are lectures about Hollywood being the devil's lair.
"So is that the big dream, then?" he asks. "To be an actress?"
"Yeah."
"Then why are you in college? Wouldn't you do better if you just acted full-time until you get your big break?"
"Mom and Nana would have seizures if I did that. They want me to have something to 'fall back on'. I don't mind. I'm majoring in film studies so I'm enjoying college."
Colby is quiet.
I watch him out of the corner of my eye as he drives. Maybe he's so attractive to me because Timothy is so unappealing. Maybe I'm like a plant starved of sunshine that will turn in whichever direction the sun is.
I hope that isn't the case.
I think of Logan Collins who I spoke to yesterday at the College Life audition. He's attractive, but I got no goosebumps. Colby gives me goosebumps. It's not about being love- starved.
Silence dominates again.
"So, who's your favorite actor or actress?" Colby asks.
It looks like he's taking it upon himself to keep the conversation going. Does that mean he's uncomfortable with the silence like I am? I would never have known that from his demeanor. He looks so confident and self-assured. But maybe he isn't. Maybe that's just a front.
"My favorite actor of all time is Will Smith," I tell him.
I can tell Colby wasn't expecting that. He looks taken aback. "Why?"
"Why not? He's hot."
"What's that got to do with acting?"